The bonds of true friendship aren’t easily broken. If you’re really close and consider each other family, you may even decide to nominate each other as godparents to each other’s kids. You could say that a relationship of this nature can be trusted to weather just about any storms life might throw at you both.
For Reddit user Maximum-Function561, he considered his friend a brother, especially when he chose him to be the godfather of his daughter. But that same friend would go on to betray him and cut him out of his life, only to come back over a decade later asking him for a rather expensive favor.
More info: Reddit
Guy considered old friend to be like a brother, convinced the guys he shared a house with to let friend move in after he split with his wife
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
Friend who’d chosen guy as his daughter’s godfather ended up plotting behind his back to have him kicked out of the house guy had helped him move into
Image credits: Keira Burton (not the actual photo)
He had a few tough years on his own, but excelled in his career and ended up living a comfortable life
Image credits: cottonbro studio (not the actual photo)
After one of the roommates revealed years later that he had intentionally gotten him kicked out of house, the guy and his friend tried to reconcile, but it never felt right
Image credits: Maximum-Function561
A decade later, his friend who plotted against him showed up asking him to pay for his goddaughter’s college, but he point-blank refused
OP begins his story by telling the community that he and Roy had met in high school and remained friends during college and for quite a few years after that. When Roy had his daughter, May, he chose OP to be her godfather. A few years later, Roy and his wife split up, and Roy had nowhere to stay.
At the time, OP was living with a few friends and convinced them to let Roy move in with them. One of the roommates, Jordan, had never liked OP and was always trying to drive wedges between him and his friends.
OP only realized how bad it had gotten when it was too late, though – Jordan, his brother, Taylor, and even Roy had plotted behind his back to have OP kicked out of the house they all shared. OP felt betrayed and hurt by all of them, but especially Roy, the person he considered a brother.
OP admits the following few years were tough, but he had a good job and concentrated on building his career. The hard work paid off, and OP says he now lives a very comfortable life.
About 6 years after he was kicked out, Jordan admitted drunkenly to Taylor and Roy that he’d masterminded the plan to out OP because he was jealous of OP’s girlfriend, who he considered out of OP’s league, as well as how easy life seemed to be for OP at the time.
After learning this, the friends tried to reconcile with OP, but, having had his trust broken, he kept contact with them to a minimum. Well, OP was in for a surprise (and not the pleasant kind) when, 10 years after the betrayal, Roy showed up asking him to pay for May’s college fees, since he was her godfather.
In his post, OP says he hadn’t been treated like her godfather for over a decade, so he flat-out refused. Now Roy, his family, and even OP’s mother think he’s in the wrong, while his wife can’t believe Roy had the nerve to ask for such a favor. OP ended up turning to Reddit to ask if he’s the jerk in this whole mess.
Image credits: freepik (not the actual photo)
From what OP shared in his post, it certainly looks like Roy is being more than a little entitled, one could even say downright cheeky. After all, it’s not the godfather’s duty to cover his goddaughter’s college fees, especially when he hasn’t been involved in her life for more than 10 years.
In her article for Love To Know, Michele Meleen writes that the modern role of being a godparent is typically determined by each individual set of parents. Both parties should come to an agreement of the specific godparent duties, and if they can’t, the parents are free to look for other godparent candidates.
Different religions expect different things from godparents, but for the non-religious, the roles and duties mainly involve being a present and positive support system for the godchild for their whole life.
Much like a close family member would, godparents should celebrate special occasions in their godchild’s life, from baptism and birthdays to confirmation days and graduations. Unless legally stated, godparents don’t act as legal guardians to their godchildren, but rather as an extension of the family.
When it comes to finances, godparents aren’t obliged to contribute to their godchildren’s financial needs, but many choose to start a college fund or purchase savings bonds. Perhaps if Roy hadn’t ghosted OP, things could have been different for May.
In his article for Psychology Today, Barton Goldsmith Ph.D. delves deeper into entitlement issues and what might drive them. Goldsmith writes that some people feel entitled to whatever it is they want, and, to top it off, they feel they deserve it right now.
A lot of these people hold the belief that if they get what they want, they won’t feel bad anymore. When dealing with someone who has entitlement issues, it can make life really uncomfortable, because no matter what you say or do, they’ll never be happy.
Goldsmith adds that if you are involved with someone who feels entitled, or if you suffer from these issues yourself, you need to make the effort to take a good look at what it is that is pushing your endless desires and robbing you of your sense of contentment.
Bored Panda reached out to Dr Goldsmith to get his insights on the situation. On the question of what he thought of Roy’s attempt to get money from OP, he said it’s very low-life and makes him fear for the daughter.
When we asked him for one piece of advice he’d offer the godfather, he had this to say, “Tell him to [get lost]. But if he’s in touch with the daughter, keep that relationship going. She needs a good father-figure to look up to.”
What do you think of Roy’s outlandish request? Do you think OP is within his rights to not just forgive and forget his original betrayal? Let us know your opinion in the comments section below!
Redditors weighed in in their masses, with all agreeing that the godfather was definitely not the jerk in the situation
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